Traversing the corridors of my mind can be risky. Simply thinking about this or that, I can tread upon a trap door of fear. Then my footing–my walk by faith–falls away, and I tumble down into the pit of “What ifs?”
But the pit is dark fantasy, a bleak unreality.
Because never do I find there a Loving Father.
Down where the trap-doors take me, I face terrors and losses alone. I imagine the worst things and no light of hope or comfort shines.
But no experience of my life has been like this. In every moment, full of grief or fear or any other bad thing, I have found strength to move forward, and hope to breathe in and out. I have had with me, someway or somehow, “the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living,” (Psalm 27:13). Just as promised.
Because God has promised, “Never will I leave you. Never will I forsake you,” (Hebrews 13:5).
And Corrie ten Boom, with an authority forged during her imprisonment in a Nazi death camp, encourages us to hold ourselves in God’s reality: “There is no pit so deep,” she writes, “that God’s love is not deeper still.”
May we give no power to the smoke and mirrors of our faithless imaginations.
May we close tightly every trap door of fear. May we climb boldly out of every pit of dark fantasy. And may we hold ourselves in today, one faith-filled footfall after another, however tentative each step may be. Because only for today do we have the Presence of Jesus with us. . . “to the very end of the age,” (Matthew 28:20).
Image Attribution: By Kris Arnold from New York, USA (Palacio Hallway) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons
Jasona,
I needed this tonight more than I can express. It is exactly what I was going through for weeks. I broke down at dinner and tried to make my husband understand that I did not know what’s wrong and that my mind was just out of control. Then I picked up my phone and read this. Thank you so much my young cousin. Love you.
Thank you, Jasona, for Heb. 13:5. When I wander near the pit with old memories I need the reminder of God’s faithfulness. Interesting, I used Corri tenBoom’s book, Tramp for the Lord in her account of her challenge to forgive when confronted by the guard of Ravensbruck. Dillon’s sermon was on forgiveness, therefore our over 80’s Community Group discussed that. See you in 2016! Love, Neva